i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Randomize
