Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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