Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
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