is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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