Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize