you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Text me some of your sweat
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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