More tranny stories later!
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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