come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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