But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
