I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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