Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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