And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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