She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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