you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Randomize
