And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
