I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Sacagawea was the original milf.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
