weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Randomize
