I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
