he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
me + whiskey = a bad person
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
