Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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