three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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