I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
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