I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
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