your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
