Is it normal to miss your booty call?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
