Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
