I only kidnapped one of them. chill
well I can't set my house on fire every night
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Randomize
