I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
