Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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