Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
