Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
