i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
