just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
