I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
