Can Purell be used as lube?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
The ass gains better be worth it
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
