I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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