My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
