The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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