I cockslap morals
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
