No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
