I wish I could punch you in the face.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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