Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize