What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I party with great urgency now.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
