You're so nebulous sometimes
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
