I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
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