He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
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