Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
