It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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