My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize