After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
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